Huh…I don’t hear anything. Where’s your outrage against the New England Patriots for the way they acted during their super bowl parade? People sure love to pounce on the Seattle Seahawks, the 80s Miami Hurricanes, and the LeBron Miami Heat teams, for being braggadocios. Where’s the outrage now? I thought we were supposed to make sure athletes were being responsible and raising our kids effectively. That’s why NBC censored Doug Baldwin’s end zone celebration. That’s why we need to make sure Marshawn Lynch talks to the media and wears the right cleats, because kids needs to see their athletes obey authority. And when they don’t live up to their fatherly standards we need to have a summit, and figure out what’s wrong with these people. That’s when we hold up example like Larry Foote and Bill Cosby, “Come on Bill. Teach these kids how to act.” What happened to the heard of ESPN analyst castigating the athletes?
I actually watched ESPN today. They broach the subject of the Patriots behavior during their parade on, His and Hers. Imagine my surprise when I heard the great Tedy Bruschi defending the Patriots behavior. When he was asked if this goes against “The Patriot Way.” He said, “I don’t think so. There are no rules for a parade.” Really, Tedy? Say it ain’t so! What if the kids are watching the parade? They’re going to think that’s an appropriate way to celebrate. Next thing you know they’re going to pantomime dropping their pants in a super bowl, and squat over a ball. And we can’t have that!
For the record I don’t have a problem with the way the Patriots or Seahawks behave. I like celebrations. I want to see more celebrations. I want Doug Baldwin to pantomime dropping his pants, while Marshawn Lynch grabs his crotch, and Tom Brady screams, “You Lost Bro!” I just wonder where all the people are at now that have a problem with it. Are you not worried about the kids? Or did you never care about the kids? You don’t talk about the kids at any other time. Perhaps it was just a vehicle to get out your alterative motive. Huh…well…got to love that “Patriot Way!”
Editor-in-Chief of Comedic Prose
Follow Kortney Williams on Twitter @kortneyshane
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