I can’t tell you how great it feels to watch Peyton Manning Stand up to the Indianapolis Colts. I might throw a parade. As a matter of fact I’m putting together a party at King of Diamonds (Miami style), and Pacman Jones is on the guest list. We’re going to have singles and scrippers. Make sure you bring you bulletproof vest, because it could be a final destination situation.
I’ve never been a fan of the Manning family. I didn’t care for Eli because of that daggummit look on his face, and I didn’t like Peyton because of the idolization surrounding him (I didn’t even like their mother because it’s her fault I had to deal with this problem). However something happened over the last year. I actually like Eli. Partly because he keeps stacking up wins like George Clooney stacks up women, and partly because deep down I think he hates dopey New York fans just as much as I do. Eli may play for New York, but he’s not New York. Eli Manning reminds me of a kid that went to college, because he had to. However as soon as he gets out he’s going to expose the world to his drinking problem and the fact that he doesn’t like New York.
I’m also starting to fall in love with Peyton Manning because, “He’s Getting his BlackMan On.”
You may be foreign to the idea of getting your BlackMan on and you should be because I made it up. I’m the founder (and not only am I the founder I’m a client). So allow me to break it down. Getting your BlackMan on is just what is sounds like…angry. Not ignorant, but angry. To give you an idea of what it would be like if someone had their BlackMan on let me paint a picture. If you were to run into someone with their BlackMan on they would be speaking clearly, wearing their hat crisply to the front, and they may even offer you some sunflower seeds. However if you question them, they would kick you in the nuts with the strength and speed of Sebastian Janikowski. I hope Jimmy Irsay is wearing a cup, because Peyton is pulling his leg back.
I love Peyton new attitude, and the way he stood up to Jim Irsay. Irsay has been completely out of line in overlooking and dismissing Manning as just another. He’s treating arguably the greatest quarterback of all time like he’s Doug Flutie. I can’t believe he had the balls to public say that Peyton was a politician…and you have to respect the Horseshoe. Respect the horseshoe….what? Are you talking about the shoe that almost went 0 – 16, without the “politician” at quarterback? It seems that the shoe is fitted for a jackass and Irsay seems to be wearing it well.
So when Peyton realized that Irsay was playing for keeps he got in full BlackMan mode, and stated that he didn’t know what was going on in the Colts organization. He also added a couple of days ago that he plans on playing, and doesn’t know if it will be with the Colts. Now that Peyton had been cleared by doctors there’s only one thing left to do. He has to leave the Indianapolis Colts for a team that plays Colts next year (preferably in the division), and slap Jim Irsay’s franchise with his dong. I just want him to keep his BlackMan intact.
Editor-in-Chief of Comedic Prose
Follow Kortney Williams on Twitter @kortneyshane